Okay.. jeg har lavet den her 'fic' , hvilket egentlig er en engelsk stil jeg har lavet til mine standpunkter, osm jeg skal søge ind på gym med.
Jeg skal først aflevere den fredag den 6. så derfor tænkte jeg at jeg ville lade jer læse og så sige hvad i synes er dårligt, eller om der er fejl osv.
KRITIK PEOPLE! ;D
nej seriøst, jeg er meget kritisk overfor den selv, da jeg virkelig SKAL have en god karakter, ellers kommer jeg aldrig videre med min uddannelse. (sure i do, but you know!)
Den er lidt anderledes,, og derfor undskylder jeg hvis den er stødende eller noget?
Jeg aner ikke om jeg overhovedet må skrive sådan noget herinde? sorry hvis jeg ikke må, så må i bare slette den ;D
Here we go.
My Angel
I walked around in London. I was looking for a place, where I could buy some cigarettes. Suddenly a girl ran into me while she was crying. She fell down on the ground.
“Hey sweetie, what’s the matter?” I said to her and gave her my hand, to help her up again.
“Nothing!” she said and went into a supermarket just around the corner. I went into the supermarket to buy the cigarettes. I tried to find the girl, but I couldn’t because of all fans that wanted my autograph, and wanted to have a picture with me. In that second I wished that I wasn't famous. I bought some cigarettes and went out again. I saw the girl standing in a corner, while she smoked a cigarette. I went over to her, she looked so beautiful then she was smoking.
“Seriously love, what’s the matter?” I asked carefully.
“Nothing…” she said sadly and started to have tears down her cheeks.
“I really don’t believe you, then you are crying”, I said and looked directly in her eyes. They were really beautiful, even though she was crying.
“I don’t want to talk to you, okay?!” she yelled and ran away. I started to follow her.
“Please just tell me that it is?” I said and gripped her by the arm, which made her turn around.
“No, I don’t want to. You are just like the other guys”, she said and looked down. That actually hurt my feelings a bit.
“Look at me. I would never hurt you!” I said and lift her head by the chin, just to get her to look at me. I took off my sunglasses and she, finely, looked into my eyes.
“Please talk to me?” I asked nicely. She nodded and looked down.
“Come love. I’ll drive you home”, I said and gripped her by the hand.
“No! I don’t want you to drive me home, and I don’t want to go home! Never!” she said angrily and looked at me.
“Why not? I wouldn’t hurt you. You are too nice, and I could never hurt anyone. If you want we could drive back to my place?” I said and began to walk back to the car. She followed me slowly and sat on the passenger seat, while she looked around in the blue mini cooper.
We came to my place, said hi to my band- and roommates: Tom, Dougie and Harry, and then we went to my bedroom; which was big, light and with modern furniture.
“Come in and sit down”, I said and laid down on top my bed. She sat on the edge, next to me.
“What’s your name?” I asked and looked up at her.
“Kathryn. And yours are?” she said and looked down.
“Danny. Can you tell me why you are so sad?” I asked and gripped her hand, once again.
She looked at me and said: “Why do you want to know that? I’m just an ugly girl!” she said and started to cry again, but this time it were worse than the others.
“Hey hey, love. You are so not ugly. You are the most beautiful girl, I’ve ever seen in my life. I don’t want you to be sad, okay?” I said and hugged her. She stayed close to me, and I liked the felling of her being close and all.
“My dad and brother… they… they rape me… and”, she whispered. I hugged her even tighter.
“I’m so afraid. I’ll get killed, if you tell anyone, what they do to me, please promise me you won’t tell anyone”. She cried, and I promised that to her. She took a deep breath and continued: “And… and... my dad hits my mom”. She couldn’t talk, because she cried so much.
“Don’t worry, sweetie. I’ll help you. As long as you are here with me, no one will hurt you. I promise you that too”, I said and looked into her eyes.
“Thank you Danny”, she said and smiled the smallest smile I’d ever seen. Then she closed her eyes and kissed me softly on the lips. The feeling was amazing; she had the softest lips. I kissed her back. I’d never felt like this before. We sat and chatted for a while.
“What time is it?” she asked.
“6 o’clock”, I said and smiled.
“Really?! I need to get home now!” she said and ran fast down the stairs. I followed her and stopped her on her way out of the door.
“Wait Kathryn!” I said. “Here is my number. You can always call me, at any time!” I smiled at her.
“Thank you so much, for everything”, she said, gave me a kiss and ran away.
I went into the living room. I sat down and played X-box with my mates. Sometimes we could play all night long, and we always did, when we were on tour.
At 9 o’clock in the evening, my cell phone started to ring; it was a number I didn’t know.
“Hello?” I said.
“I can’t live anymore!” It was Kathryn’s voice, she was crying.
“Of course you can, you have to! I can come and pick you up, and then we can go to my place, if you want?” I asked. Kathryn started to cry.
“Okay”, she said and told me the address.
10 minutes later, I was at her house. I picked her up, and we want back at my house again.
“My brother did it again”, she cried. I hugged her. Then she didn’t move. She passed out.
“Kathryn?!” I yelled, but she didn’t answer. I called 911, and they drove her to the hospital. I sat on a chair next to her bed all night. Then she woke op. I ran over to her bed and started to kiss her cheeks.
“Why am I here?” she said.
“You passed out, but its okay now”, I whispered.
“Have the nurses called my parents?” she asked. Then a nurse came in.
“We have called your parents, and they are here now”, she said. Kathryn started to scream, just as her parents and brother came in.
“Hello dear!” her father said and laughed.
“Stay away!” I said.
“Why? It’s not your daughter!” the father yelled.
“No she’s not! But look, what you are doing to her!” I yelled, and the mother nodded.
“Don’t tell me, how to educate my daughter!” he yelled. Then he started to hit the mother, just to get his aggressions out. Some nurses came in and carried out the mother and father. I went out with them.
When I came in again, I saw the brother sitting on Kathryn. Then he did it, right here in the hospital, in front of me. He raped her. I hit him right in the face and called in the nurses. Kathryn took on her clothes and started to cry. I carried her back in bed, and laid next to her while I hugged her tight.
“Everything will be all right now, love”, I said and kissed her cheek.
Then her mother came in and said: “Your dad and brother will get in jail. They’ll stay there for a long time, because he has confessed everything. But I have to talk to the police, anyhow, now. Bye sweetheart”, she said and kissed Kathryn on the cheeks. Then she went out.
“See, told you so.”, I said and smiled teasing.
“I know. Thanks. You are my angel!” she said and kissed me.
Og undskyld for den lange post ;D
![My Angel [DONE] Ikkenavngivet1yo8](https://2img.net/r/ihimizer/img522/1900/ikkenavngivet1yo8.png)
Forumforside 
tror du får en god karakter for den 
Men stadig husk at læse den igennem et par gange mere inden du aflevere den, ellers ender det bare altid med at man bagefter kan se nogle dumme fejl 
Men super!
